(In)Audibles

Babydaddy typically has to entertain Babygirl when she's getting her diaper changed so she doesn't cry or fuss too much with the procedure. Typical the dialogue includes, "Where's your hair?" and she grabs her hair, "Where's your belly?" and she'll pat her belly. "What does mamma say?" and she says, "ssshhhh" (from the song, Wheels on the Bus- the mammas say "sssshhhh"). I'll also ask, "What does the pirate say? and she'll say "arrrg".

We recently branched into animals like cow, bear, lion, doggie, still trying to get cat/kittens, sheep, duck and horse down. Interestingly, as auntie TP came to visit this wknd, she got stage fright and forgot all her animal sounds. Now when I ask "What does the lion say?" Like a good Asian girl, she'll cover her mouth and giggle. The same goes for the bear sound. Truth be told the bear and and the lion sounded the same, but when will the roars come back?

It's quite interesting how Babygirl has acquired language, or has stopped acquiring language. For instance despite Babydaddy and Babymamma asking if she wants "raisins" each day, she'll agree and state she wants "nonnies." Despite not really watching TV, she now knows who Elmo is, and refers to Elmo, as "Elco." Again despite corrections, her parents say "Elmo" and Babygirl says "Elco." Guess we got a strong willed baby.

Another word she has been saying repeatedly is "bucky, bucky, bucky." No one has any clue what she's referring to, but she seems to enjoy saying it and is typically smiling when she says it. The only thing I can think of is when I would call ducks, "ducky."

On the flip side, her comprehension of proper English words, commands and what not is improving. We can ask her to sit, and if she wants, she'll sit. When we ask her to use gentle hands, her lobstah claws transform to paint brushes. She can typically put things where she found them, when I ask, this especially comes in handy when she's taking out every card from my wallet.

One of the strangeest thing is that she'll wake up in the middle of the night and ask for a "bopple," not necessarily to drink, but just to have. Babymamma and I have discovered she just likes the comfort of a cold bottle near her at times, so we've now always have a babybottle filled with water on ice.

Babygirl is weird, but we continue to love the joy she brings to our lives.

It's So Hard. . .

. . . to say goodbye to Babygirl these days. Just the other day I held Babygirl, gave her a hug+kiss and began to leave just like every other weekday morning, only this time Babygirl let me know how she really felt. Babygirl threw down her sippybottle with vengence, began to scream/cry and stomp her feet. I was frozen in my tracks, how do I leave a girl who's clearly unhappy with saying goodbye.

I wouldn't say that Babygirl is more clingy, or needy, but I would say we continue to have our own special moments where we come up with new ways to bond, find new ways to laugh, or silly new things we learn together. She's into independent play, able to self soothe, and ask for things.

I guess in some ways my schedule has changed as I've been playing ultimate frisbee this summer(something I look fwd to starting in Feb). I'm away 1-2 nights a week for ultimate, but on top of that I'm working 2 evenings a week, so that really leaves very little time for quality time. Also in the mix, has been 7:3oAM physical therapy appts x2/week, which takes away from some AM bonding(although that's going to end this Fri.)

I wish I could say that Babygirl is just exhibiting large emotions with goodbyes, but it really doesn't happen when Babymamma goes out, or when we're leaving someplace, but it only seems to occur when I'm leaving by myself. I guess she's really letting me know how she feels, and I can't help but sigh, and feel guilty and sad for leaving.

It would be one thing if I just never came home, and I was perpetually absent every night, but it's the small amount of time that I'm home which is just a tease for her and perhaps gets her all excited to see me, and then quickly I'm going out the door. I can only hope that things will get better in time, but perhaps in time Babygirl will only begin to expect that "daddy just likes to go places with me."

I guess in many ways Babydaddy has got to do some thinking about his whereabouts on a day to day basis, and re-think his schedule, even if it means cutting back in work. How have other dealt with the balane btwn spending time with family vs. providing for family vs. balancing the needs of one own's self and sanity?

Father's Day

Happy Father's day to all the dads out there. I hope everyone is relaxing and not having to mow the lawn or anything.

As Obama says, "Any fool can have a child. That doesn't make you a father. It's the courage to raise a child that makes you a father."

I hope that every dad is encouraged by the people around them to continue to persevere as fathers with the various challenges and difficulties of home, work, and the world around us.

May we continue to have the courage to be present in the lives of our children, the mothers of our children, and for the children whose fathers are not present in their lives.

not because i'm lazy

not sure why the posts have been slow and non existent, but in the absence of all this, i found an appropriate dad article for folks.

i can't say i'm like this writer, but i do like his question re: needing to reinvent the perception and conception of the American Man.

http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2009/06/09/man_up/print.html

Monkey Love

Do ya'll remember those sock monkeys that we grew up with, they hand long gangly arms and legs, and the best part was that the hands had velcro on them so they could connect so you could wear your monkey around your neck like big ol fuzzy bling, 80's style? Well I never had one of those, but I don't think I was missing much. I don't even think I was missing much when I didn't have my own Coco the Chimp.

After Babygirl's little bout with having a cold- waking up in the middle of the night due to fevers, runny nose, etc., we got a nice little bond going on. On the flip side, she's not sick any more, but she's going through a needy stage, and does not like to be consoled by Babymama if I'm around. I think the for the last couple of mornings, I've had to make my breakfast+lunch while holding Babygirl in one arm, just like one of those monkey with the velcro hands.

Sometimes Babygirl is pats me on the head, or strokes my hair with her hands, other times he hands morph into a mean Bahston Lahbstah Clah or a violent monkey and leaves marks on my face or neck. I enjoy being a source of reassurance, sense of safety, and nurturing Babydaddy, but c'mon Daddy also needs to be productive and efficient with his AM routines, as well as not go into the office like a rabid squirrel landed on his face while biking to work.

Irregardless(Babymama's least fav word), I still love this monkey baby of mine, and will continue to take the good with the bad, but really it's not even that bad, so it's really a whole lotta good, mixed with equal amount of love.

In Love with Babygirl

Babygirl, it's been a pleasure to hang out with you the last two evenings without Babymamma. During this time I just had so much love for you, and I also became aware that I need to find the balance in my love. Otherwise I would regress back to freshmen year in college when I thought my then girlfriend was going to be the girl I would get married to and have kids with, that's not the type of love you'll need growing up.

With the absence of Babymamma we've gotten to bond, learn some new things, and just play. We learned a new body part- you now know where your tongue is, and stick it out quite frequently these days. We watched a couple minutes of BBC's Planet Earth, and you thought the polar bear cubs were "bow wow's,"(dogs) and empathized with their hunger, and offered them your "bopple" (bottle).

You've also been thriving in many ways, just eating everything in site, and you seem to be getting bigger, taller, and heavier each day, which is all a good thing (we're almost back up to double digit percentiles for your weight, yeah!). You're into climbing, and sharing your food, pacifier, bottle, with me and your stuffed animal pals. You've also discovered the word and concept of "mine," which is a shocker for both Babymama and I.

You've also had some difficulties at night, waking up due to not being able to find your pacifier, just being uncomfortable, etc. which has led to increased time we spend in the dark. Sometimes I sing, we'll re-read "Gossie," or sometimes we just rock. Most often you ask for "Geoge,"(Curious George) to help soothe you, and if I'm lucky you'll fall asleep with your head on my chest, like earlier this AM. It's all these little moments that makes my heart melt, and allows me to furiously ride my bike home to spend whatever time I have with you before you head off to bed, or I head off to my other office.

Despite getting older, it's good to know that I can still rock you to sleep, and teach you silly things. For now I can give you all this undivided attention and love, and that's ok.

State of Panic

It's been almost 2 years now where I have gone to bed with the possibility of being awakened. The fall of 2007 is when I officially began moonlighting at a local hospital as their on call psych emergency guy from 12am to 8am couple nights a week. After a few months, Babygirl arrived.

Often times I'm confused or just simply pissed when I wake up to the pager going off. There was a time when Babymamma thought an ice cream truck crashed into our place due to the ringtone of my pager. These days, I grab my pager instinctively, and wake up with pager in hand wondering how I woke up without remembering hearing the pager ringing.

After more than a year, the shrill of Babygirl crying still jump starts my slow beating heart to full on panic. Not sure what I'm scared of or panic-ed about, usually Babygirl just needs her pacifier, often times milk, or is just letting out some cries while she's sleeping.

Babygirl is safe, we lock doors and windows, she's healthy, we're past SIDS stage- not sure if Babymamma ever awakens in a panic due to the cries, but I still do.


No worries, Babygirl is really not a Buckeyes Fan.