Oops

Does this blog still exist? Obviously I've lost track of it, but actually it's been on my mind. One day I vow to post, and then it doesn't happen. I say I'll post when I have more time, and then more "post-able" stories come into play, and so I need more time, time I don't have and so 4 months later the blog devoted to dads and Babygirl is nonexistent.

Well on the eve of Babygirl's 1st birthday, I vow to get back into blogging, although I've decided to post regularly, albeit less lengthy and substantial posts. I've set the standard to simple Twitter-esque posts.


I've been a dad for a year, and it's been lots of fun. There are many things that are still foreign to me, and I have not spend an entire day with Babygirl by myself in the last 9 months. It still puzzles me how Babymamma can do it day after day, and most importantly I am lucky and happy that Babygirl is under the care of my wife. A woman whom I always knew would/could be the mother of my child, and do a good job at it.

As a dad I've fell into very boring gender type roles of being a "breadwinning dad," I work so that Babygirl can stay at home with Babymamma. Yes over the last year, I've worked many more hours, gotten a lot less sleep, and drank a lot more caffeine, waking up each morning knowing that Babygirl is happy, thriving developmentally in a safe and nurturing environment makes the long days, and sleepless nights totally worth it.

I'm sure many dads and mom try to find the appropriate balance btwn work and time with baby, and I can't honestly say I've found the balancing point, but for now, it works. Of course I wish I could spend more time with Babygirl, of course I miss her during the day, and of course Babygirl does not get all of my undivided attention when I am not at work, but we're all trying, and it continues to be a work in progress.

I guess being a dad, the ideals of being a dad, and the challenges of being a dad are ever evolving. For now, this is how it is. Also as a dad, the sense of providing for a family only renews my own depleted energies to continue to give back to Babygirl and Babymamma. Thank you both, and Happy early Birthday little one.

Babygirl is a droid

Baby girl is nearing 7 months of life. There's not a whole lot of mind blowing things to blog about. For a girl she's still lacking hair, she's not bald, but it's still pretty thin and trying to grow in ever so slowly. She's sitting up by herself, but the whole idea of crawling isn't really working. I think she may learn how to stand up on her own before she crawls. Babymamma and I have thought she's been teething since 4 months ago. What do we really know, Babygirl was drooling a lot, and always had her fingers in her mouth, needless to say at 7 months, she's still pretty toothless, but has some great gums for dentures if we ever wanted to go that route.

Other than that I have the distinct pleasure of feeding Babygirl some food, usually some kind of pureed veggie and fruit. I try to keep the messiness down, and try to instill some order so there's not a lot of playing with food, so far it's going well, and oh she's eating well too. Of course what goes in must come out, so our days of "clean poop" are long gone. Let's just say things are a bit more messy in every way possible than the good ol' days.

Speaking of the good ol' days, it's almost hard to imagine the little infant I held with one arm that barely moved or cried, is now bigger, bolder, and even cuter. She's really exploring her surroundings, responding more to people, trying to interact with others, developing some autonomy, pretty cool things to be a part of.

Part of all this growing up and reaching developmental milestones is the countdown to actually talking. I keep wondering what the voice of my child will sound like, this for me is more exciting than her running or catching a frisbee. Which leads me to wonder when George Lucas was thinking about what an Ewok and R2-D2 would be like, I wonder if he a little baby in the house. When I think of Babygirl, all rollie pollie, clumsy with her motor skills, but still very cute, that's probably a good way to describe an Ewok no?

Well Babygirl is also reminding me of every one's fav droid. There is nothing decipherable about how R2 communicates with others, it's typically a whirl of high pitched beep, blips, screeches and flat tones that allows R2 to be understood by others. Quite similarly, Babygirl likes to shriek in high pitched tones, grunt and roar like a Simba, and make other noises that put her closer to a droid than human. For now it's cute, and I just play along and make various sounds back. No worries I also talk to her like a human quite often and read with many different English accents. But no where have I read that part of speech development is to sound like R2-D2 before graduating to talk like C-3PO. For now, I continue to enjoy doing my best James Earle Jones impression, "Babygirl, . . .I"m your father."

Swingin' Baby

6 Month Gear Review

Baby Girl turns 6 months old in a couple of days, which also happens to be Baby Mamma and Cornucopian Dad's 3rd wedding anniversary, so yeah for everyone! Since I can't seem to manage a proper blog (one that updates at least once a day), instead of writing anything witty or cute, I have decided to write about something near and dear to me . . . . . .gear!

So there's no particular order or ranking to the gear, but I tried to include as many helpful links as possible, maybe my helpfulness will lead to people leaving comments?!?.

Micralite Toro
What can I say, the various choices, possibilities, and budgets for strollers can be overwhelming. How much do you want to spend? How heavy is it? How maneuverable is it? What kind of accessories and colors does it come in? Will it fit in doorways? Will I be able to put it in my trunk, or do I need to upgrade to a Minivan now!?!

Of all the criteria for strollers, I think the one that gets neglected is, "What does Baby Girl want?" Is it possible that not all strollers are comfortable to every child? I can't say that Baby Girl went to fancy baby store and said, "Daddy, I like the Toro, because of it's clean design and its practical for mamma." Baby Girl did go try out this stroller and other ones that made the short list, and she didn't seem to fuss too much btwn the various choices.

The Toro is great, it's light, it's sturdy, and it's compact. It's got 12" air filled wheels in the back to hop those curbs, and eat those brick sidewalks. This stroller is smooth, I don't know if it's the wheels, the bearings, but its very effortless to push, and it's probably just a smooth of a ride/push as the baby jogger(see below). There aren't too many bells and whistles on this pram (no cup holders, telescoping handles, trays, etc.) There's a more than easy and effective brake for the stroller, multiple reclining positions, and great deal of ingenuity in how the stroller opens/closes and collapses. I think I remember reading that the Micralite was the love child of golf caddy company or people who designed them, hence the similar mechanism in opening/closing, etc.

This was a great buy for us for many reasons. I imagine it would have been a bit cheaper had it not been made in the UK and imported, but its still cheaper than some of it's counterparts, and comparable in price to others in the same range. It's definitely under 20lbs, it's compact, and dreamy to push. Baby mamma gets mad compliments from people about how cool our stroller is, and Baby Girl couldn't be any happier.

Graco Snap N Go
What's not to love about this, it's light, it's functional, and it's cheap! If people want to go out and buy a fancy bassinet stroller, that's great for them, but if you don't have a car, you're going to have to get a car seat so you might as well use the carseat as part of the stroller.

Baby mamma had no problems with this simplistic stroller. It even had plenty of undercarriage storage to help haul grocery, diaper bag, etc. The adjustable handle bar and cup holder are great too(if you're into such things). You can even lock of the front swivel wheels and go for a very lite jog on very smooth roads in sub-division (the joys of visiting the grandparents). Did I mention that we bought ours "gently used" on craigslist for cheap!

Red Castle Infant Carrier
If you haven't figured it out, I'm not one to play by the rules and trends, and like to be different. Baby Mamma says it because I'm and We're both first borns. Anyways, I don't know about you, but I'm sick of seeing Baby Bjorns. I'm surprised Baby Bjorn parents are not the swing demographic( ie, Nascar dad's, soccer mom's, etc.) in this year's election.

When I first saw this carrier, it made all the sense in the world. Waist strap? Why that makes perfectly good sense in carrying a load. Why would any parent subject themselves to carrying the weight of their child all in their back or shoulders? Every backpacker knows that the key to carrying a big pack is being able to distribute the weight to your waist or more specifically your hips. Shoulder straps are more about balancing the weight, and less about bearing the weight.

So back to the infant carrier, this one stood out, we liked the multiple positions that Baby Girl could transition into as she got older, and has enjoyed just about every position out there. Yes there's straps to adjust and it can look complicated, but all in all, they're all there for all the necessary adjustments to make things comfortable for the parent, and keep the child secure. Be leery of infant carriers that don't offer ways to adjust for differentpositions, body types, etc. Baby mamma is 4'11" and I'm 5'10" and we're both able to use this very comfortable.

Baby Jogger
I couldn't help but get a Baby Jogger, so I could go jogging/running with Baby Girl. Of course I couldn't justify getting a brand new one. So I found one on craigslist that got minimal use. Yes there had been some major design improvements than model I own, but it's still very functional, and most importantly it had 3 16" bicycle wheels. If you're going to be jogging/running, you want at the very least 16" wheels, 20's if you're going to be running 5 miles+.

Baby Jogger, known for making great jog strollers due to their very smooth push/roll and how straight the stroller goes even with just one hand on the handlebar. Don't settle for smaller wheels, or other brands that may look just as nice, but may not be as fun/easy to run with. Joggingstroller.com is a great resource for what works, and what's available, and has a great community of reviewers who run and like their strollers.

Aquarium
Not sure if Baby Girl would have ever fallen asleep without this one. You would think after 160 some odd nights of listening to the the same songs she would get sick of this, but she loves it(glad we got this at the baby shower without even having to register for it, thanks friends!). Baby Mamma and I would also perk up in glee during the evening when the aquarium would just magically be turned on. The verdict is still out if Baby Girl the fitful sleeper she is, turns it on inadvertently, or would wake up, and hit the button for the soothing glow of the aquarium and now familiar tunes to send her back to dreamland. Whatever the case may be, we like it, she likes it, and there's even a remote so that you can turn on the aquarium all stealth without the baby seeing you (we like making eye contact with Baby Girl, but sometimes that might lead to "I want to play, I want to eat, or everything else that's not appropriate for 3am"). Obviously this was a feature that was more useful when she didn't know how to turn it on herself :)

Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter, Spring

my apologies in not posting regularly or not regularly enough!

Spring, last year, this was a hectic time for Mamma and Daddy. We spent the latter parts of Winter and into Spring going to open houses and looking for a place that we could hang our hats and write all over the walls, with no fears of losing our security deposit. Going into Spring was exciting as the weather gave away, and snow was melting, and yes we finally found a place that we loved.

Spring was full of many firsts such as working with not so hard working real estate agent, borrowing large sums of money that we may or may not be able to pay back, hiring a moving company, and living in a new place that had a bathroom for Daddy and Mommy. Spring is also when the miracle of conception occurred too. Let's just say getting Mommy knocked up wasn't necessarily planned for Spring, but we didn't mind at all either :P

Although as dad's can be, Daddy began to be all concerned about how we're going to afford private school for you, all the cool toys that we never got, as well as how to avoid foreclosure, cuz babies aren't cheap, ya know? Spring was a time of much celebration, many answered prayers, and many blessings.

Summer, I wish I could say was full of great trips to the beach, and enjoying our new home. Daddy took a pay cut, at work, not because he's a bad worker, but more there was a "restructuring" of how people got paid for their work. Needless to say the income that Daddy was projecting to make for the year came to a crashing halt with the limit of not being able to make much more in the near future.

Thankfully the Summer was not overly oppressive, minus the heat waves that would come by. We entertained a few of Mommy and Daddy's friends where they officially could stay in the guest room, vs on the futon in the living room of our small apartment. We felt so grown up with our nice appliances and counter tops, as well as Mommy's interest in decorating and painting.

Summer was also a time mommy and daddy celebrated their 2nd wedding anniversary, with a nice day trip just a ferry ride away. We also became equally nervous and excited as the summer was coming to a close, how we would soon be able to meet you, as well as begin to alert the world of your developing presence in mamma's body.

Fall brought on many new changes for Daddy and Mommy. Mommy was really getting into the thick of things at work, and was getting more familiar and comfortable with her writing job. Daddy on the other hand was experiencing various challenges with job(s). Daddy took on more responsibilities at the clinic, which required more mtgs, and less direct time with clients. Daddy also signed a contract to join a private practice. Also in haste and uncertainty with our financial situation, Daddy also accepted a job at a local ER, covering on call over night shifts for any emergencies.

Again Fall was a time of much change and excitement. Another season of fervent prayer, and blessings in securing 2 jobs to make up the difference in Daddy's pay cut, and to help out when you were a real person in our lives. Fall was also when we first got to see you inside of Mommy, and also when Mommy was becoming noticeably pregnant.

Winter was all about taking things in strides. Mamma was growing uncomfortable as well as had difficulty with the various adjustment to being tired, hungry, emotional, etc. (of course not in that or any order). Winter also brought on the holidays which was celebrated with Daddy's side of the family visiting with us for almost a week, all of which we just took in stride.

Winter was also was a time of adventures such as Mamma's commute from hell, as well as precarious winter bike commuting by Daddy. Daddy would be lying if we weren't full of anxiety and worries for the future of this family, but again we stayed in stride, and just took everything on day at a time. And of course, our most exciting adventure of all, your arrival.

And here we are, back to Spring again, the thawing of winter allowed us to take you out in the strollers through our neighborhood. At this point, Mamma and Daddy we're about to throw in the towel on the lack of sleep we were getting, but we turned the corner, you started sleeping more, your personality started to shine through, as a family we survived the back to back to back visits of all 3 sets of grandparents, and you were just our very own bundle of joy to love, caress, kiss, take care, and sing to.

while summer is officially here, we expect many more adventures, prayers, and many more blessings with our life spent with you this season, and for many more.

Just a Blur

Its been about 4 weeks since my last post. You would think things were pretty boring at home, and daddy just forgot about you. Quite the contrary, for the first time I was overwhelmed with guilt because I was not going to be able to spend significant time with you. Of course as the adult I want to place the blame on you babygirl, but really it's partly my fault as well as the adjustment with you growing up. Let me explain.

In the last month, you have been quite the joy- facially animated, physically active, and just a sweet baby. Another big thing that's occurred in the last four weeks is the fact that mamma and daddy are sleeping a lot more these days, simply because you're sleeping a lot more. Another part of growing up is that you don't need to be consoled to go back to sleep anymore. Long gone are the days when daddy would rock you to sleep on the rocker, or the nights I would find songs to sing to you.

These days you're as consistent as Amtrak, not always on time, but we have a rough idea when you'll be going to your dreamworld, or alerting us with distinct cries that you're arriving back to an awakened reality. Mamma's putting you down around 7ish and you may or may not wake up within the next hour or so, just to let us know that your pacifier has fallen out or your music has stopped, and you want it back on. Typically after this, you'll wake up around in an hour's window btwn 1-2am, for a feeding and diaper change. After this you're usually asleep til 6-7:30am. If you're lucky, you're awake at 6-6:30am where you'll get propped away from the TV, but totally in view of daddy doing yoga. You particularly like when I'm doing moves like Sun Moon- lots of stretching and swinging of arms while breathing slowly.

Since you're going to bed at 7pm these days, that really limits my time with you these days. Sometimes I'll be home after 6pm, so then my time is pretty limited. Other times I'm off at my other office and don't get home well past your initial bedtime. Daddy tries to play ultimate one night a week, but by the time daddy get homes, you're sleeping peacefully. Wknds can be tough too, since daddy spend a considerable amount of Sundays at the office, and Sat can be full of church activities or catching up with other friends.

Am I turning into daddy's parents who were immigrants who had to work long and hard for everything daddy got? Not sure how to answer this question, but I do feel guilty that some days I may not get to spend significant amount of time with you for a stretch of 2-3 days. Of course as you continue to grow and get older, you won't require as much sleep, but that's many years away, and hopefully I will not have to continue to work and feel this way about my time with you for years.

The most important thing is that mamma is with you, she loves being home with you, and she's so grateful that she can be there with you. Of course if the roles were reversed daddy would have no problems with it either, but the reality is that daddy has to work a lot. I'm still figuring out this whole fathering thing, and hope that I will find and strike a better balance btwn work and play time with you.

I miss ya babygirl.

*You're more than just a blur in my eyes*

Updates to babygirl

Babygirl, you're one day shy of being a dozen weeks old!

This past wknd being Patriots Day here in Boston, as well as Marathon Monday, daddy had a long wknd, and a long wknd it was spending with you. There was many moments of quality time all wknd long. I'm even beginning to think that you're even liking me a little bit more than the previous weeks. You're able to endure long periods of me holding you, and just hanging out with you, all this is evident by your smiles, new noises, and the sounds of premature laughs/giggles.

Some of the things you've enjoyed is daddy beatboxing, choreographing movements for various songs he sings, or general infant calisthenics to give those joints range of motion. You particularly like fist pumping, bilateral arm swings, and knee bends. We had a nice long walk in the arboretum, where I had you harnessed in the carrier, you slept the whole time, so I guess you liked it.

Mamma has been reading you kiddy books with pictures, while daddy continues to read you updates from Team Slipstream, Sports Illustrated articles, or anything else that daddy likes to read. Since there haven't been any vocal complaints with daddy's selection of readings, I will continue until you get bored and demand colored pictures about koalas, worms, or bears.

If you were wondering, there are less poopy diapers throughout the day, but that just means there's a 50/50 chance that we may have an explosive mess to clean up from time to time. Of course cloth diapering continues to be a big hit with your butt- no rash, and no complaints. Hopefully we'll have you in underoos in no time.

Yesterday daddy was able to get away and play some ultimate! I've been itching to play shortly after you were born. It was good to get out there, and scrimmage against a team that I was familiar with. Of course the team that I picked up was not so familiar to me, but it was good times. Like I told mamma, "expect cuts and blood," and of course I didn't disappoint. One left handed layout attempt at a pass that looked like it was for me, but wasn't, led to scrapes on the elbow, hip, and knee area, and minimal blood. As for first time playing and throwing since the fall, I felt pretty good. Had some good throws, no dropped passes, no stupid throws, and holstered the hucks. I also had one lucky D, where I jumped in front of my defender with my back towards the disc, and able to knock the flight of the disc away from my opponent, and negated the other teams attempt to score, yeah daddy!

Other than that, daddy's been able to run at least 2 times a week for the past 3 weeks, and that's been feeling great. Not feeling entirely fast, but hoping to get back some speed, lose some this slowly growing gut. I've also started doing yoga workouts from the DVR, pretty good way to start the morning while you're asleep of course. So now that you're older, daddy's been a bit more active, and even mamma's getting the itch to get away from strollering, and get back to rock climbing and what not.

You've been a joy so far, and you're doing some cool things these days, I hope that I can just keep up with you and catch them along the way!

large coinslot?

You might be wondering what does coinslot have to do with being a dad? Well it has to do with everything in the end.

Let me first back up this truck for just a quick minute. If your babymamma and you used to fight about not putting the dishes away, after lil baby arrives, most likely babymamma and you will have a fight at some point for not putting away baby's clothes, toys, etc. If you're a dad like me who has developed all these neurotic and OCD like ways of accomplishing tasks/chores/activities, and you expect others to learn and fully embrace the "daddy way," you might be the same way when it comes to taking care of your baby.

If one has all these neurotic ways of doing things, of course any other way than the "daddy way" is always going to seem so silly, naive, or futile to me. For instance this babydaddy likes to fill the car up with gas when there's 1/4 tank left, why would one delay the inevitable any longer? Ask me how many times I've been caught with no gas in the tank? That's right, never, and I intend to keep it that way. Of course it would just blow my neurotic mind if babymamma would ever let the refueling process go until the warning light went on (Just to set the record, babymamma has always been diligent at keeping the car gassed up). The point is that I have accumulated a whole mess of ways of doing things, and of course this has translated to being a dad as well.

As I've mentioned before, we've been cloth diapering baby girl. Of course since the start of diapering, there have been a series of the "daddy way" of diapering. Such as, since babygirl's first days of life at the hospital, I just assumed that I wouldn't want some strange man undiapering me, an wiping my butt with a wet washcloth. So being the empathic human-being that I am, I would give babygirl a sign, I would give babygirl a warning wipe off to the side of her butt, just to let her know that daddy is about to plunge into the nooks and crannies of her girl parts for a cleaning with something wet. Of course this continued as we came home, and started using wipes (being the practical parents that babymamma and I are, we opted not to get a babywipe warmer) I would continue to give her the cold warning wipe to the side to let babygirl know how cold this wipe was going to be, and she could brace herself for the unpleasantness of someone wiping her bottom.

One of the biggest things that I've made sure in cloth diapering, was the position and the tautness of the diaper. As I've mentioned before I liken changing a diaper to a full service pitstop for a NASCAR driver, there's a need for organized speed, and crucial elements that need to be taken care of. From day one, I've always wanted a taut diaper for my babygirl, cuz that's what this daddy thought was best for babygirl. The thought of poopy pants, explosive poops that blow through diapers, or God forbid a poopy bed sheet in the middle of the night seemed like things I would not like to experience, and completely avoidable.

To counter my poopy nightmares, I figured the "daddy way" is going to be all about a taut diaper that will contain all runny fecal matter where it's suppose to be. Of course the reality of keeping poop in the diaper and diaper cover is tougher than all the precautionary steps one dad can take, but I like to think "daddy's way" is still pretty good. On the other hand, diapers that babymamma places on babygirl, have led to some uncontained explosions. Of course there is no scientific proof of this or any way of confirming this, but this is what I like to think. (not that I'm hating on my babymamma, I love her dearly!)

As babygirl is currently in the 90th percentile in length, positioning of the diaper is important. I understand that sometimes babygirl is fussin' during a change, or that babymamma's tired, but sometimes babygirl's diaper is just sagging like a straight up thug when I go to change her. Of course babymamma would say that this occurs because babygirl is squirmy, active, and cuz the shear amount of pee and poop in the diaper has weighed down the diaper. I like to think "daddy's way" of proper positioning and tautness would have avoided such things.

Now bringing it back to coinslot here. Not sure if babygirl's is just long or large(however you want to look at it) due to her 90th percentile in length but, the "daddy way" is all about covering every bit of coinslot when he's diapering. This may mean that our babygirl looks like the Steve Urkel of babies, with her diaper hiked up way high, but when I go to change that poopy diaper, ya know what, all that runny poop is where it's suppose to be- all up in the coinslot, and in the diaper.

Long story short, or at this point, to make an already long story from getting any longer, the "daddy way" of diapering is: 1) Making sure that babygir's diaper is covering all of her coinslot 2) Taut enough around the waist to prevent any sagging 3) Covering every bit of cloth with the diaper cover to prevent any leaks. Of course this being the "daddy way," it's not babymamma's way all the time, and of course this become a point of contention. Ain't no blows being traded, nor at this point I wouldn't even call them fights, but it's one of those things when I'm changing a diaper, I shake my head and think, this is definitely not the "daddy way."

And for this reason, I may have in the past said something to babymamma about diapering the "daddy way" and then a verbal exchange would ensue. Which of course is why I like to warn all the dad's to be, whatever that it is that allows for unpleasant discussions to occur at loud or low volumes, those patterns and themes of why those happen will only be carried into when this baby arrives. Sure it's all sweet and sugar plums to have your own progeny in the flesh living at your place, but the same relationship struggles just mutate into baby related things.

Here's to all the dad's to be, good luck!